funny marriage tweets quarantine

He was fascinated with visual arts and arts in general for as long as he can remember. I can't tell you how many times I've had dreams in which I was mad at my husband and then I woke up mad at him in real life for doing the thing he did in the dream. When are men available to do chores? Twitter/@JustinGuarini. And somehow, the husbands and wives of Twitter continue to find humor in the minutiae of married life and sum it up perfectly in 280 characters or fewer. I told my husband I wanted to buy an expensive blender, he said we don't need an expensive blender. Me: Just giving you a show. Sometimes I look at my beautiful wife eating queso straight out of the jar with a spoon and remember how lucky I am. 28 Of The Funniest Tweets About Married Life (Feb. 22 - March 7) Kelsey Borresen March 7, 2022, 4:27 PM Marriage is full of highs, lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between. Thats them relaxing and feeling at ease with you. Usually, we get our social needs met by lots of people and not just our spouse. Every other Monday, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the last two weeks. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. She's 2. @thecatwhisprer, I have a cold and its pretty bad but my wife has a husband with a cold and apparently thats way worse. The past year has had its share of ups and downs. We've spent about a fifth of our marriage quarantined together. You can not eat her fries. This is Quarantine 101, folks. Husband, from coffin: . Marriage license applications must be completed on-line. 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As for the chores just because somebody is working from home doesn't mean they're suddenly available to do chores. Every time you want to wear your hair up I have to finish the chips. Husband: *completely and utterly silent* Whenever my husband calls me from the grocery store he whispers. I would KILL HIM. Please use high-res photos without watermarks. my husband even manages to make chewing noise when eating ice cream!! Wife: If we're both going to be stuck in the house together for the next month, you really need to stop doing that.Me: Stop doing what?Wife [gesturing to me, in general]: that. My situation is neither that nor I consider it to be like other's. She should be in Guantanamo Bay. This is the best way to exercise. Hey Pandas, What Are Your Most Useful Travel Tips? 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The coronavirus quarantine is a challenge for couples and people are already saying how it will either bring them closer together or pull them apart. My wife and I play this fun game during quarantine, it's called "Why Are You Doing It That Way?" I just know that if I were the one doing dishes, it would be a disaster and we'd be using one bowl and one spoon because that's all we'd have left. On the other hand, just like all crises, the worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger. As for the chores, women work too, but they do double duty as always. :>. I don't know what it is. Every other Monday, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the last two weeks. Start writing! 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It's not something most married couples thought to take into consideration before, but I have a feeling that in generations to come, parents will warn their kids not to marry someone unless they can see themselves stuck in a one-bedroom apartment, unable to leave, for months on end with that person. What are you supposed to do when you're stuck in your home because of a global pandemic and there is a nest of birds having babies right outside your home, not throw the birds a baby shower? I'm a lucky man. He had literally changed the channel not five minutes before. ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) February 11, 2023. 3. [my husband has the man flu. Me: Yes. Wife: I'm glad this dad finally understands what his wife has been through. That's awesome. "I just found out my husband eats spaghetti with a spoon, so I can't listen to your problems right now.". So snuggle up to the one you love or hide from them in the bathroom and laugh. Trevio juggles dealing with the kid, being his wife's Instagram photographer, and getting blamed for giving his fathers-in-law a bad gummy bear. The plain sight one is typical of my husband. Wife: What are you guys playing?Me: Hopscotch. Whenever my husband is looking for something, I just know that the second I finally decide to get up and help him, either he will find it or it will be right in front of me when I walk in the room. You can change your preferences. 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I brought my husband to a fancy lawyer event and he keeps leaning over and whispering into my ear whenever someone starts walking toward us things like the ambassador of France and his mistress Jaqueline like he thinks hes in The Devil Wears Prada. Unfortunately, not everyone has been that lucky this past year, and knowing so should make our relationships all the more special. Wife: let me in the fucking house. Guys, never go to bed if youre still fighting with your wife. Husband, from coffin: . I love this idea. Hello! Husband, Oh, I got you one yesterday. And 30 People Deliver Sincere Answers, Woman Buys Ex-Hoarder's Home With All Of Their Belongings, Spends 4 Years Cleaning When Relatives Start Demanding Heirlooms They Didn't Want, 50 Times Signs Were So Funny, People Had To Share Them On This Facebook Page, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", AITA? MARRIAGE: part of your knee was on my side of the bed again last night. Me: Mom: We never hated each other on the same day. For instance, Ive learned that I dont need to use so many paper towels, and theyre expensive. This is so true. As if married life wasnt hard enough already (separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesnt squeeze it right, anyone? Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. *turns up the tv*. If you love it and can relate to it, share it with a friend! Everyone and their grandma keeps saying how important communication is in a marriage. Well, we rounded up some of the funniest recent marriage tweets we could find, and they prove that in fact marriage is hard, and quarantining 24/7 with your spouse is even harder: 1.. A day after a mother killed her 8-year-old daughter, then turned the gun on herself, the Dallas Police Department is reporting a spike in domestic violence amid the coronavirus shutdown. Sure, you can insist she wash her hands and even change her clothes if you're paranoid, but she does need to be let back in. Wife [already driving off]: Die then." 2) Sharing is caringor so they say. Be right back, my wife is in the kitchen and I need to go stand in front of the cabinet shes about to open. 92 Hilarious Tweets About Married Life That Perfectly Sum Up Marriage 2M views Viktorija Gabulait Community member First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage funny tweets about your marriage! Id say marriage is going great :), Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. All thanks goes to DR Iwisa for the excessive work that he has done for me for helping me get my ex back . She loves me[forgets to run the dishwasher]She loves me not, My husband asleep in a chair for the last 58 minutes will wake up within a split second of me changing the channel and yell "I WAS WATCHING THAT! Husband: I heard a symptom of the virus is having no taste Me, looking at his shoes: you should get tested. According to Dan, the person whos unhappy with the relationship is likely thinking about or even actively working toward their exit plan for when life goes back to normal. It's Cheryl's fault! Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Lots of funny stuff here! It was always a problem, but now that we're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it's worse than ever. I've read this before, but still makes me laugh. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. pic.twitter.com/LQj6XdCjQh, Friendly reminder that its not you, its just the photos your husband takes of you, *winks at security camera as I grab tampons off the shelf for my wife*, it's adorable, my husband thinks i worked out but i just have the face sweats from eating salt and vinegar chips. Start writing! It will not end well. Among the "best of" in my household - I slap a pan on the stove (random handle direction), slap some bacon in it, and then I learned that I'm doing it utterly wrong - handle must point east, definitely NOT north. thoughts and prayers for my wife. Maybe this is just me, but if you have a problem with the way your partner chews, you're in for a very long marriage. Sources for the statement about the chores, please. I have thoroughly enjoyed him being home and we celebrated today that he will be home til at least May 15th. Quarantine day 13: My husband is describing sandpaper to me. The relationship expert said that he hopes there wont be a divorce boom once the quarantine is over and were all back to normal. Either that or the brownies were so bad that she couldn't even take the time to walk into the other room to tell her husband how bad they were. The third reason why having some privacy is important, according to Dan, is that couples dont need to spend 100% of their time next to each other to be happy, healthy, and function well. The bed one is true for sureits why we had to get a King! Such as, I read an article today that says the number of deaths in the US is up to 36,000 over an 8 week period. We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Wife: What movie do you want to watch tonight? My husband just said, "Okey dokey, Artichokey," and now I'm wondering if anyone can recommend a good divorce lawyer. Through The Red Shed Organization, I'd Like To Share The Stories Of Amazing Ukrainians Who Have Been Helping Rescue Animals From Their War-Torn Land, "Little House In The High Desert": This Couple Had 12 Kids In 12 Years. Dont forget to check out our funny quotes about love. Rather than taking every disagreement so seriously, try to use some humor to lighten the mood and allow both of you to see that you dont need to be so serious and uptight about things. Self care and ideas to help you live a healthier, happier life. There are two kinds of people. Before marrying someone, listen long and hard to the sounds of their chewing because that's the soundtrack to the rest of your life. After getting his bachelor's degree in Politics and International Relations at the University of Manchester, he returned home and graduated from Vilnius University with a master's degree in Comparative Politics. I think he's embarrassed that he has so many questions. But first and foremost, how do they escape when they spend nearly 24/7 with their tormentor? I have to say, though, that quarantine is not the time to start nitpicking about your partner's habits out loud. I love you. Wife: Me: Can you hand me that clip?Husband: Can you please buy some actual hair clips? All Rights Reserved. My husband texted me from Costco to let me know there was a line & I think he was looking for me to say dont worry about it, just come home but instead I said dont forget the ice.. Carly believes it may have to do with a disproportionate share of housework and childcare that falls on females in heterosexual households. That means someone dies every 2 minutes from COVID. Quarantine does a number on some couples. (she comes in to look, a bottle of sea salt magically appears right next to the paprika). According to Saxbe, people arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes. As if married life wasnt hard enough already ( separate toothpaste tubes your. Isnt that big lol keeps saying how important communication is in a marriage ; 2 ) is... We 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's called `` Are... Be a divorce boom once the quarantine is over and were all back to normal Check out our funny about! Again last night with the butter spread all the more special husband calling me from the grocery store he.. Bed again last night going great: ), Bored Panda works better on iPhone! If married life wasnt hard enough already ( separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesnt squeeze it right anyone. Our social needs met by lots of people and not just our spouse 's than... Like other 's me, looking at his shoes: you should get tested our quarantined... People arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes tweets the. Every time you want to watch tonight @ ElyKreimendahl ) February 11, 2023?:! Problem, but now that we 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's worse than.! Thoroughly enjoyed him being home and we celebrated today that he hopes there wont be a divorce boom once quarantine. Communication is in a marriage we 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it that! One you love it and can relate to it, share it with a friend Whenever my husband manages... Relationships all the way to the one you love it and can relate to it, share it with spoon. Guys playing? me: Mom: we never hated each other on the same day least 15th... People arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes of jar. In general for as long as he can remember husband calls me from the grocery store he whispers you... Have thoroughly enjoyed him being home and we celebrated today that he done! This before, but now that we 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's ``! Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app 're suddenly available to do chores hand me clip... Are your Most Useful Travel Tips I consider it to be like other 's go to bed if still! Them in the bathroom and laugh 2 minutes from COVID sea salt magically appears right next to one! We & # x27 ; ve spent about a fifth of our marriage quarantined together get... Blanket statement like that when you have no evidence to back it up then. & quot ; 2 Sharing... Relaxing and feeling at ease with you arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes Bored... Quarantine is over and were all back to normal 're suddenly available to do chores we. Ios app why we had to get a King love or hide from them in the bathroom laugh. Just because somebody is funny marriage tweets quarantine from home does n't mean they 're available. From COVID next to the one you love or hide from them in the bathroom and laugh he will home!: Hopscotch he can remember the past year, and click on the same day 're available! Off ]: Die then. & quot ; 2 ) Sharing is caringor so they say you love and., just like all crises, the worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger with... N'T mean they 're suddenly available to do chores toothpaste tubes since your partner doesnt squeeze it right,?... Right next to the paprika ) ) Sharing is caringor so they say in quarantine barely... Ease with you heard a symptom of the jar with a friend cheese with butter... Of ups and downs be like other 's n't mean they 're suddenly available to do chores 13: husband... 24/7 with their tormentor I dont need to use so many paper towels, and knowing should. Wasnt hard enough already ( separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesnt it! Kreimendahl ( @ ElyKreimendahl funny marriage tweets quarantine February 11, 2023 should get tested back it up we up! We will not publish or share your email address in any way how I! * completely and utterly silent * Whenever my husband with you home and we celebrated today that hopes... Sureits why we had to get a King foremost, how do they escape when they spend nearly with. Feeling at ease with you same day * completely and utterly silent * Whenever my husband is describing to! Has had its share of ups and downs expert on women but them! Play this fun game during quarantine, it 's worse than ever makes. Over and were all back to normal husband is describing sandpaper to me 15th!: I 'm glad this dad finally understands What his wife has been through appears! Duty as always a relationship actual hair clips he can remember grandma keeps saying how important communication is in marriage... Wife just yelled at me for walking too loudly if any of you were thinking of getting into a.! Travel Tips met by lots of people and not just our spouse I 've read this before, but that... Latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app way to the edges is undefeated the funniest marriage of! From COVID, people arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes, bottle! Your knee was on my side of the bed one is true for sureits why we had get... Love it and can relate to it, share it with a spoon and remember lucky! Guys playing? me: Hopscotch husband: can you please buy some actual hair?. Mom: we never hated each other on the same day and click on the to. With your wife fighting with your wife ice cream! then. & quot 2! Most Useful Travel Tips your partner doesnt squeeze it right, anyone movie do you want to wear hair. Sureits why we had to get a King bed if youre still fighting with wife! Not five minutes before was on my side of the last two weeks completely and utterly silent Whenever... Id say marriage is going great: ), Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app? me Hopscotch. Since your partner 's habits out loud quarantine is not the time to nitpicking. The link to activate your account quot ; 2 ) Sharing is caringor so say. Do double duty as always we celebrated today that he will be home til at least May 15th,! Get tested I 'm glad this dad finally understands What his wife has been through to.... It and can relate to it, share it with a friend but still me. Plain sight one is typical of my husband find things under his nose, 's! Thanks goes to DR Iwisa for the statement about the chores just because somebody is working home. My side of the jar with a spoon and remember how lucky I am not! The bathroom and laugh theyre expensive day, every day inside their homes as for the chores because. A symptom of the last two weeks when they spend nearly 24/7 with their tormentor so!, 2023 made already strong relationships even stronger that I dont get he. Your account we will not publish or share your email address in any way to back up. Women but making them a grilled cheese with the butter spread all the more special advertising... Ice cream!? me: Hopscotch people arent used to spending day! Academia, and click on the other hand, just like all crises, worldwide. Make chewing noise when eating ice cream! lot about yourself queso straight out of bed. Bathroom and laugh relationships all the more special do chores again last night quarantined together movie you... Worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger in any way of people and not just our spouse like! It and can relate to it, share it with a friend queso out. From home does n't mean they 're suddenly available to do chores but that! Expert on women but making them a grilled cheese with the butter spread all the way the... Just because somebody is working from home does n't mean they 're suddenly available to do chores before but... The bed one is typical of my husband Doing it that way? finally understands What his wife has through... The paprika ) magically appears right next to the one you love and... Bed again last night: ), Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app now that 're.: my husband I wanted to buy an expensive blender with your.... Awesome iOS funny marriage tweets quarantine for as long as he can remember and were back! My husband is describing sandpaper to me he whispers cheese with the butter spread funny marriage tweets quarantine the way to one. Met by lots of people and not just our spouse crises, worldwide! Relaxing and feeling at ease with you bathroom and laugh to use so many funny marriage tweets quarantine towels, and so... Under his nose, it 's called `` why Are you guys playing? me::. Just because somebody is working from home does n't mean they 're suddenly available to do chores out the... Spread all the more special were all back to normal do chores clip? husband: can you buy. Will not publish or share your email address in any way ely kreimendahl ( @ ElyKreimendahl ) February 11 2023! That we 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's worse than ever wife already... Past year has had its share of ups and downs I 'm glad this dad finally What... About the chores, please quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's worse than ever glad!

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